Sunday, September 30, 2007
be satisfied.
i really do hate myself sometimes, so much that i feel like giving myself a real good kick. but then again, you'll probably miss yourself and end up hurting someone else when you try to kick yourself. oh. and i hate myself because sometimes i just cant seem to find the right words to express...anything. and that's how we get misunderstandings etc etc etc...
ask me what on earth am i doing here on the eve of my exams.
and i would have said, no idea.
honestly, when i said i don't mind being retained.
it's a side of me i never knew.
you see, my attitude changes depending on which ground i stand.
look to your left and see msg 2.
i want my As, badly.
"only A2s will do"
hahahaha i wish i could laugh now.
so many days, weeks, months later.
will i realise that that's really what i want
and what i've been working for.
perhaps not hard enough.
i've taken a liking to writing random, yet awesome poetries, again
however on the other hand, i'm not so sure, about whether they're being classified as poetries
because certain verse just seem so long
like the one above above.
that may be the reason why cherie'e poems are special :)
have a great night, world. and live to see light each morning.
"tell me when the sun's up"
i like that, thatnks for the message :)
but when the sun's up, i'll be facing my personal guillotine.
nono, it won't be a set up, by others.
i set it up myself.
each time, when i walk onto the podium
of tests, exams and etc.
i never asked myself whether i'll be satisfied with a B,
i will never ask myself whether i will be satisfied with a C.
because that would be stopping to low,
too low to try to fail.
maybe.
i'm leading nowhere and i know it.
its just an endless stream of rambles.
handwriting...
spelling errors.
wait till i review this post to see if there were more typos than yesterday.
wehn you start writing, the second sentence comes,
the third
and fourth
and then a paragraph
and then a page
a chapter
a volume
and finally, your life has been written out into series.
that may be why i dont like math.
monotony. the questions are the same
and that's why i never bother to try and get close to math
and understand it
finally soar with it.
writing, in my opinion is different.
people near me knows that i detest short term relationships
which is why i hate math, math sums with the most 2-3 pages of working.
which is why i love novels, novels that an go on with a thousand words, a thousand pages, a thousand chapters.
detesting short term relationships means
right from the start, i will not appreciate classes.
2 year log relationship.
people see it long, i see it short.
i judge a lot of things based on potential.
potential relationship
potential story lines etc etc etc
relationships that are lasting, and of quality.
i like.
story lines. i keep them with me.
math formulas, i see no need of them.
storylines reflects our lives.
a lot
and they were actually penned by pensieve people.
maybe that's why pensieve is spelt like that.
i'm starting to limit mystery and teenage novels.
and i'm starting to read Coelho and Steel.
they are more deep.
probably more matured
no matter how harsh the world is depicted
its the truth, truth that lies in those deep, silverfished pages.
when will i end?
haha...i aint satisfied with my post yet.
aint satisfed with how much i've studied.
aint satisfied with myself.
be satisfied, be satisfied, be satisfied.
i've decided. i'll print out a copy of my post, and paste it on the class notice board after eoys. it might be kudos you receive, but receive them. notes that were painstakingly written down.
a phase ends. for it, it will carry on. for some, it comes to an end. for those whom i say, i'll dedicated a whole new entry for you. the entry is for life. and the length of the entry can only be determined by how far we walk together.
ask me what on earth am i doing here on the eve of my exams.
and i would have said, no idea.
honestly, when i said i don't mind being retained.
it's a side of me i never knew.
you see, my attitude changes depending on which ground i stand.
look to your left and see msg 2.
i want my As, badly.
"only A2s will do"
hahahaha i wish i could laugh now.
so many days, weeks, months later.
will i realise that that's really what i want
and what i've been working for.
perhaps not hard enough.
i've taken a liking to writing random, yet awesome poetries, again
however on the other hand, i'm not so sure, about whether they're being classified as poetries
because certain verse just seem so long
like the one above above.
that may be the reason why cherie'e poems are special :)
have a great night, world. and live to see light each morning.
"tell me when the sun's up"
i like that, thatnks for the message :)
but when the sun's up, i'll be facing my personal guillotine.
nono, it won't be a set up, by others.
i set it up myself.
each time, when i walk onto the podium
of tests, exams and etc.
i never asked myself whether i'll be satisfied with a B,
i will never ask myself whether i will be satisfied with a C.
because that would be stopping to low,
too low to try to fail.
maybe.
i'm leading nowhere and i know it.
its just an endless stream of rambles.
handwriting...
spelling errors.
wait till i review this post to see if there were more typos than yesterday.
wehn you start writing, the second sentence comes,
the third
and fourth
and then a paragraph
and then a page
a chapter
a volume
and finally, your life has been written out into series.
that may be why i dont like math.
monotony. the questions are the same
and that's why i never bother to try and get close to math
and understand it
finally soar with it.
writing, in my opinion is different.
people near me knows that i detest short term relationships
which is why i hate math, math sums with the most 2-3 pages of working.
which is why i love novels, novels that an go on with a thousand words, a thousand pages, a thousand chapters.
detesting short term relationships means
right from the start, i will not appreciate classes.
2 year log relationship.
people see it long, i see it short.
i judge a lot of things based on potential.
potential relationship
potential story lines etc etc etc
relationships that are lasting, and of quality.
i like.
story lines. i keep them with me.
math formulas, i see no need of them.
storylines reflects our lives.
a lot
and they were actually penned by pensieve people.
maybe that's why pensieve is spelt like that.
i'm starting to limit mystery and teenage novels.
and i'm starting to read Coelho and Steel.
they are more deep.
probably more matured
no matter how harsh the world is depicted
its the truth, truth that lies in those deep, silverfished pages.
when will i end?
haha...i aint satisfied with my post yet.
aint satisfed with how much i've studied.
aint satisfied with myself.
be satisfied, be satisfied, be satisfied.
i've decided. i'll print out a copy of my post, and paste it on the class notice board after eoys. it might be kudos you receive, but receive them. notes that were painstakingly written down.
a phase ends. for it, it will carry on. for some, it comes to an end. for those whom i say, i'll dedicated a whole new entry for you. the entry is for life. and the length of the entry can only be determined by how far we walk together.
fast and furious.
SENSITIVE CONTENT
i've been wondering a lot these days, on the bus rides and short 'daydreaming' sessions in between tasks etc etc.
mrtan mentioned on his last math lesson with our class, lessons with hit you fast and furious and either you catch it or you lag. fast and furious.
recently, or rather this whole week, i've been stocking up books to read. and i finished reading Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom. its a good break from all the books and last minute facts to memorise before eoys. and all the thoughts shared between morrie and mitch, initially started off as another thesis to write but ends up as a No. 1 bestseller. and all these really impressed me and intrigued me. i really have no idea whether all those tuesdays actually took place, the back of the book stated that it was non-fiction, so i shall assumed they did. however, it really impressed me, how morrie had managed to go against and work against the things he never believed in.
back to fast and furious. reading this book has been an insight to me and a path for me to pave out my thoughts, thoughts that i have had inside me for a long time, unable to string them out properly into a proper entry. it had filled in the gaps as did many other books. perhaps this is why i enjoy reading, tremendously.
i had realised that, a long time ago, how people led their lives depended and were and still are influenced by the culture. from when we were young, parents racked their brains over kindergartens to enrol their kids into, which primary schools to enroll their kids into, which secondary school is more prestige, which junior college offers what a growing half-adult needs, which university or which country is better for the future of your child...etc etc etc.
i can't say those people, strangers or non-strangers, who read my blog have experienced everything mentioned above, as a parents. but you can be sure that, your parents have racked their brains over such issues before. it might not be about education, i quoted the example as i believe it is the most common. it can be living area, or anything along the line. but why is the choice of school, back to the education issue, that important to parents? school culture, what kind of people will you meet? hardworking students, those who constantly strive to overcome difficulties and do better and better each test, each exam to win oneself, or students who live for the sake of living, end up as gangsters, get involved in secret societies and do drugs? perhaps that was the most important issue on your parents' minds but is that what that matters?
its a culture. its the culture that runs in the country. but the schools basically divides this country into several 'bands'. the 2 main ones, the what you can call, elites. and another, hawkers.
but at the end of the day, these people live for one reason. to earn money. why? no money = no survival. do you have to earn money quick? oh yesyes, so that you wont lose out to others. you wont lose customers to other stalls, you wont lose customers to buy this ever wonderful armchair, you wont lose customers to the other housing agency.
they all, despite of living in the different banks, different schools, different status in the society, different powers, they all sing, no live, the same tune.
earn money fast. why? customers come, everything fast fast fast.
is it important? yes yes, survival is important.
is money that important? perhaps. but i must say, today, money is the least important. why? there are things money cant buy, in fact, money can only buy the material things. it cant buy love, it cant buy contentment. oh yes, i can. but what? for grown adults, you can buy 'love' and contentment. one-night stands. that's it. and the next night you'll search for another.
people see things, and deem things important. because the culture says so. so people live a life to earn money, raise a family. and then? at the end of the day, they can't bring themselves to say, i am enjoying my retirement.
the lessons will be fast and furious in sec3. customers will come fast and furious. you get them or your competitors will. you spend your life fighting for something which you will understand as empty.
cars. terrace houses. cash cards. and all the other things. money, the main culprit. the main culprit to destroying this wonderful culture built. because its fast and furious. that is why you find old men, old women who are retired sitting at coffee shops, nothing to do. or rather, do not know what to do.
because suddenly, you find, that you have forgotten how to take time off to enjoy this earth. you have spent the major 60 years in your life rushing homework, passing tests, clnching As, earning house points, collecting prizes, winning trophies, rushing thesis, fighting for better jobs, earning money, saving for wedding...etc etc etc.
you find no time to look at the things you see everyday but never notice.
when you slow down, you learn the important things. you learn that work is not important. your As will not help you earn love. perhaps it will determine whether you will be promoted to the next level or not, whether you will end up in a triple-science stream. however, what will become of this As?
when i read Tuesdays with Morrie, i saw Amy Tan's comment on the book. but i couldn't help but wonder if after reading the book, because of this culture living in all of us, she goes back to the fast and furious life.
i read the book. and i wondered if i will go back to my fast and furious life. As. are As that important?
the more i think about it, the more i see importance in the things i believe in. God. if tribulation, end of times is to come to, or even tomorrow. i will be more than glad to embrace it. because i do the things i believe in.
perhaps some believe that it is a shameful thing to admit that you're in a dire situation, i'm admitting here that i haven't done well at all, this whole year. count the amount of Fs and Es i get, and compare it with the amount of As i get.
when i'm in school, and when i'm in solitude i believe my attitude is very much different. in the public library, or in school, i'm living the fast and furious life. studying, As. wear my school jacket and sit at the library for the whole day to show that, see, i am from the elite school, i study very hard. but when i'm away from those prying eyes of others. my attitude changes and i am once again flooded with all these guilt of living this hyprocritic life.
some say that it is inevitable. its life. but i believe otherwise. life is something else. and i'm sorry to say, i have yet found out the answers.
some may say, you turn to religion for answers. leave religion out of this discussion. find a better solution from me. and i can assure you, you will find none.
it sounds deep, and perhaps and agony for some to read it and then realise that its very much an honest reflection of our lives. but take heart people, understand this. reflect on how you've been leading your lives. eoys here, or not.
i've been wondering a lot these days, on the bus rides and short 'daydreaming' sessions in between tasks etc etc.
mrtan mentioned on his last math lesson with our class, lessons with hit you fast and furious and either you catch it or you lag. fast and furious.
recently, or rather this whole week, i've been stocking up books to read. and i finished reading Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom. its a good break from all the books and last minute facts to memorise before eoys. and all the thoughts shared between morrie and mitch, initially started off as another thesis to write but ends up as a No. 1 bestseller. and all these really impressed me and intrigued me. i really have no idea whether all those tuesdays actually took place, the back of the book stated that it was non-fiction, so i shall assumed they did. however, it really impressed me, how morrie had managed to go against and work against the things he never believed in.
back to fast and furious. reading this book has been an insight to me and a path for me to pave out my thoughts, thoughts that i have had inside me for a long time, unable to string them out properly into a proper entry. it had filled in the gaps as did many other books. perhaps this is why i enjoy reading, tremendously.
i had realised that, a long time ago, how people led their lives depended and were and still are influenced by the culture. from when we were young, parents racked their brains over kindergartens to enrol their kids into, which primary schools to enroll their kids into, which secondary school is more prestige, which junior college offers what a growing half-adult needs, which university or which country is better for the future of your child...etc etc etc.
i can't say those people, strangers or non-strangers, who read my blog have experienced everything mentioned above, as a parents. but you can be sure that, your parents have racked their brains over such issues before. it might not be about education, i quoted the example as i believe it is the most common. it can be living area, or anything along the line. but why is the choice of school, back to the education issue, that important to parents? school culture, what kind of people will you meet? hardworking students, those who constantly strive to overcome difficulties and do better and better each test, each exam to win oneself, or students who live for the sake of living, end up as gangsters, get involved in secret societies and do drugs? perhaps that was the most important issue on your parents' minds but is that what that matters?
its a culture. its the culture that runs in the country. but the schools basically divides this country into several 'bands'. the 2 main ones, the what you can call, elites. and another, hawkers.
but at the end of the day, these people live for one reason. to earn money. why? no money = no survival. do you have to earn money quick? oh yesyes, so that you wont lose out to others. you wont lose customers to other stalls, you wont lose customers to buy this ever wonderful armchair, you wont lose customers to the other housing agency.
they all, despite of living in the different banks, different schools, different status in the society, different powers, they all sing, no live, the same tune.
earn money fast. why? customers come, everything fast fast fast.
is it important? yes yes, survival is important.
is money that important? perhaps. but i must say, today, money is the least important. why? there are things money cant buy, in fact, money can only buy the material things. it cant buy love, it cant buy contentment. oh yes, i can. but what? for grown adults, you can buy 'love' and contentment. one-night stands. that's it. and the next night you'll search for another.
people see things, and deem things important. because the culture says so. so people live a life to earn money, raise a family. and then? at the end of the day, they can't bring themselves to say, i am enjoying my retirement.
the lessons will be fast and furious in sec3. customers will come fast and furious. you get them or your competitors will. you spend your life fighting for something which you will understand as empty.
cars. terrace houses. cash cards. and all the other things. money, the main culprit. the main culprit to destroying this wonderful culture built. because its fast and furious. that is why you find old men, old women who are retired sitting at coffee shops, nothing to do. or rather, do not know what to do.
because suddenly, you find, that you have forgotten how to take time off to enjoy this earth. you have spent the major 60 years in your life rushing homework, passing tests, clnching As, earning house points, collecting prizes, winning trophies, rushing thesis, fighting for better jobs, earning money, saving for wedding...etc etc etc.
you find no time to look at the things you see everyday but never notice.
when you slow down, you learn the important things. you learn that work is not important. your As will not help you earn love. perhaps it will determine whether you will be promoted to the next level or not, whether you will end up in a triple-science stream. however, what will become of this As?
when i read Tuesdays with Morrie, i saw Amy Tan's comment on the book. but i couldn't help but wonder if after reading the book, because of this culture living in all of us, she goes back to the fast and furious life.
i read the book. and i wondered if i will go back to my fast and furious life. As. are As that important?
the more i think about it, the more i see importance in the things i believe in. God. if tribulation, end of times is to come to, or even tomorrow. i will be more than glad to embrace it. because i do the things i believe in.
perhaps some believe that it is a shameful thing to admit that you're in a dire situation, i'm admitting here that i haven't done well at all, this whole year. count the amount of Fs and Es i get, and compare it with the amount of As i get.
when i'm in school, and when i'm in solitude i believe my attitude is very much different. in the public library, or in school, i'm living the fast and furious life. studying, As. wear my school jacket and sit at the library for the whole day to show that, see, i am from the elite school, i study very hard. but when i'm away from those prying eyes of others. my attitude changes and i am once again flooded with all these guilt of living this hyprocritic life.
some say that it is inevitable. its life. but i believe otherwise. life is something else. and i'm sorry to say, i have yet found out the answers.
some may say, you turn to religion for answers. leave religion out of this discussion. find a better solution from me. and i can assure you, you will find none.
it sounds deep, and perhaps and agony for some to read it and then realise that its very much an honest reflection of our lives. but take heart people, understand this. reflect on how you've been leading your lives. eoys here, or not.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
God Put a Smile Upon Your Face
i've been wondering, why of all the times, now? when i so desperately need the time to you know, mug for eoys. but still, God has a purpose, and though i havent seen it yet, i believe in God's purpose.
yup. proposing smth that should take up most of my time. anyways. :) I LOVE SPRING ONION! HER HUBBY SHALL BE ONION AND THEY WILL MATE!!!
haha....dont ask me why i got such a name called spring onion. well, i called my sister pig and she called me spring onion and well. i had no other names to give my poor terrapin so spring onion it shall be!
so now i own 1 terrapin, spring onion, 3 guppies, honeydew, eggplant and cabbage. :D i'm going to buy a smaller box for my terrapin tomorrow, also, i'm going to buy spring onion her onion. :) and she won't be lonely. haha...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O_Sg0oUJ-4
this song is great! God Put a Smile Upon Your Face. :D
yup. proposing smth that should take up most of my time. anyways. :) I LOVE SPRING ONION! HER HUBBY SHALL BE ONION AND THEY WILL MATE!!!
haha....dont ask me why i got such a name called spring onion. well, i called my sister pig and she called me spring onion and well. i had no other names to give my poor terrapin so spring onion it shall be!
so now i own 1 terrapin, spring onion, 3 guppies, honeydew, eggplant and cabbage. :D i'm going to buy a smaller box for my terrapin tomorrow, also, i'm going to buy spring onion her onion. :) and she won't be lonely. haha...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O_Sg0oUJ-4
this song is great! God Put a Smile Upon Your Face. :D
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
i swear i'm hating eoys.
haha....i dont like eoys....lalalala
okay. i'm studying hard. really. but i doubt they'll help. studying hard i mean. anyway. i did sinful things yesterday and the day before...
dan brown's brilliant, i swear he is. i mean he's a pure genius. read all his books, and you'll realise how brilliant he is. he just invents numbers and codes and everything else and put them into his novels and wala. he can cause such, controversy.
christians are publishing magazines to proof that he's wrong from left right centre, top and bottom. non-christians or rather darwin-ians are trying hard to prove otherwise with scientific explanations.
dan brown's simply brilliant. brilliant as in the mind, but i dont support his theories. :) i'm a christian.
i realise i'm a little bit of a saddist. i love reading heartbreaking books. haha! like 'Between the Tides' one sad book, 'Dance for you Daddy' also. yeah.
i finished those to books in 24hours btw. bash me. i'm supposed to be studying!
but still, i have like 2 feet in height worth of books to read. :) i bought 3 books yesterday and would have bought another 3 if i hadn't convinced myself that i wouldn't want to eat nothings on thursday and friday. :) i love books!
i love walking into a toilet smelling not of air-refresher but of books. well, i always leave my books on the shelf, in the toilet. yes. and this morning my mum was just complaining about me leaving my books around the house. she was going, is this yours? is this yours? are these yours? haha! and then she went, how come you books are all over the place?! and they're not like revision books or asssment books, but novels.
anyway. books to read:
Deception Point (read this - re reading.)
The Zahir (i've read this, re-reading)
By the River Piedra I sat down and wept.
The Wind-up Bird Chronicle
that's only 4 and the list goes on.
contemplating whether i should buy Half-Blood Prince or continue to wait. yesterday i almost paid for it. but decided that i shouldnt. buy one books or buy 3 books. buy 3 lah! hahah! being a kiasu singaporean. tsktsk!
okay. i'm going to shower and then go for mugging sessions! :D i want to watch balls of fury!!!! i shall bring my sister :(
okay. i just saw smth really disgusting. my brother killed an insect. well, he captured it and trapped it in a ball kind of thing. and now the poor insect's dead. its a fly...a fly with magnified eyes. my brother's a genius! hahh!
okay. i'm studying hard. really. but i doubt they'll help. studying hard i mean. anyway. i did sinful things yesterday and the day before...
dan brown's brilliant, i swear he is. i mean he's a pure genius. read all his books, and you'll realise how brilliant he is. he just invents numbers and codes and everything else and put them into his novels and wala. he can cause such, controversy.
christians are publishing magazines to proof that he's wrong from left right centre, top and bottom. non-christians or rather darwin-ians are trying hard to prove otherwise with scientific explanations.
dan brown's simply brilliant. brilliant as in the mind, but i dont support his theories. :) i'm a christian.
i realise i'm a little bit of a saddist. i love reading heartbreaking books. haha! like 'Between the Tides' one sad book, 'Dance for you Daddy' also. yeah.
i finished those to books in 24hours btw. bash me. i'm supposed to be studying!
but still, i have like 2 feet in height worth of books to read. :) i bought 3 books yesterday and would have bought another 3 if i hadn't convinced myself that i wouldn't want to eat nothings on thursday and friday. :) i love books!
i love walking into a toilet smelling not of air-refresher but of books. well, i always leave my books on the shelf, in the toilet. yes. and this morning my mum was just complaining about me leaving my books around the house. she was going, is this yours? is this yours? are these yours? haha! and then she went, how come you books are all over the place?! and they're not like revision books or asssment books, but novels.
anyway. books to read:
Deception Point (read this - re reading.)
The Zahir (i've read this, re-reading)
By the River Piedra I sat down and wept.
The Wind-up Bird Chronicle
that's only 4 and the list goes on.
contemplating whether i should buy Half-Blood Prince or continue to wait. yesterday i almost paid for it. but decided that i shouldnt. buy one books or buy 3 books. buy 3 lah! hahah! being a kiasu singaporean. tsktsk!
okay. i'm going to shower and then go for mugging sessions! :D i want to watch balls of fury!!!! i shall bring my sister :(
okay. i just saw smth really disgusting. my brother killed an insect. well, he captured it and trapped it in a ball kind of thing. and now the poor insect's dead. its a fly...a fly with magnified eyes. my brother's a genius! hahh!
Sunday, September 23, 2007
i just read some posts i posted...2 years ago? exactly. haha...surprisingly i was studying hard for psle at that point of time.
but i felt so carefree...and i was slacking and all and mt results were so freaking good. i really dont understand sometimes.
when i put in effort, my results will steep so low. and when i dont study and everything. i get close-to-perfect scores like i dont know. 90%. it only happens like, once in a term, but still it happens. thank God for math sia or i'd have fallen flat on my face, though i've fallen flat alr.
i really dont understand. really.
i bet no one knows and i really feel so to. ohman. i'm gonna cry. yesterday...haha, i meant fri. i cried on the way to school...and on the way back.
i told myself everything would change, it seems like i was so wrong. but seriously people, this isn't an emo post. neither am i dry, yet. i'm just wondering, wondering, wondering...
really. i'm going to try to upload a song, a chinese christian song that changed my life. or rather, changed my perception of God, quite a while ago.
全新的你：
the original (but i cant find the original original sung by Strem of Praise):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGozTekfq3g&mode=related&search=
a response
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BYfJUwdB8k
祷告：
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5hwJL5fCvY&mode=related&search=
but i felt so carefree...and i was slacking and all and mt results were so freaking good. i really dont understand sometimes.
when i put in effort, my results will steep so low. and when i dont study and everything. i get close-to-perfect scores like i dont know. 90%. it only happens like, once in a term, but still it happens. thank God for math sia or i'd have fallen flat on my face, though i've fallen flat alr.
i really dont understand. really.
i bet no one knows and i really feel so to. ohman. i'm gonna cry. yesterday...haha, i meant fri. i cried on the way to school...and on the way back.
i told myself everything would change, it seems like i was so wrong. but seriously people, this isn't an emo post. neither am i dry, yet. i'm just wondering, wondering, wondering...
really. i'm going to try to upload a song, a chinese christian song that changed my life. or rather, changed my perception of God, quite a while ago.
全新的你：
the original (but i cant find the original original sung by Strem of Praise):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KGozTekfq3g&mode=related&search=
a response
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BYfJUwdB8k
祷告：
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5hwJL5fCvY&mode=related&search=
Saturday, September 22, 2007
God strike me for what i've done. i should just skip service today. and go there at the last minute. i really need to learn to cool myself down.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
going to work.
I have this superior whom i meet at work everyday, or rather, when i go to work. but the funny thing is, he always knows what am i doing, where am i, why did i not turn up for work today, where did i go to escape work etc etc etc.
i never knew why, and i never understood why, and i didnt know that he was that, resourceful? powerful, shall we say. He knew exactly what was i doing/thinking. and i did not know that this mighty mighty boss even existed when i just started working in his company.
i only found out about him 2 years ago. but i certainly had heard rumours about him when i went to work some 4 years ago. i never believed in his existence.
until one day, when i MIA for a long long time. and he decided to look me up, at my home. He came and told me to go back to work in his company, believe that being in his company would be the best thing that could happen. i mean, he's so nice and kind. imagine if your dad did not turn up for work for say, a few years? and yet his boss still do not fire him. weird, right? but yeah, my boss was THAT weird. he even came to my house when he rules like, billions or even gazillions in his great big wonderful office. i felt so honoured that i just broke down and cry. perhaps the word is a little bit not modern, but still i must say that he was extremely merciful. anyway, i decided to go back to work. i as so touched that i just broke down at his feet and started crying. a little bit dramatic, but yes. i was extremely touched.
anyway, i went back to work. i was extremely hardworking for a while. you know, when he came down personally to my home to invite me back to work, i was so touched. i was so honoured. i was something in his eyes. some one in his eyes, i was worthy for this great man to not just look at me, but hear me explain why i failed to turn up for work. i was worthy to him that i deserve his forgiveness and and everything else that he was offering me.
but soon after that, i slacked. i no longer feel proud for who am i. i started to do all sorts of bad things to attract his attention and all. hoping that he'll come to visit my home again. but what i never knew then was that he was always always looking at what i was doing.
soon, when my efforts did not pay off, i decided that i'll just stop coming to work. since i'm no longer worthy in his eyes, i might as well just stop working for him.
what i never knew was, he never stopped looking out for me.
and He, is God. He, is Jesus.
i want to continue to work in His kingdom. i dont want to be someone who is always not turning up for work. I do not want to be a
part time worker. i want to work there full time.
oh God, bring me back. let me experience you again.
you know, he is so merciful that he WILL forgive you of all your impurities and unrighteousness if you confess your sins. he will overlook all your imperfections and love you as much as you
deserve the love that he pours out unto you.
He knocked on my door and i took ages to answer Him. don't let Him wait, he will always be knocking until you open your door and open your heart to Him and invite Him into you.
i never knew why, and i never understood why, and i didnt know that he was that, resourceful? powerful, shall we say. He knew exactly what was i doing/thinking. and i did not know that this mighty mighty boss even existed when i just started working in his company.
i only found out about him 2 years ago. but i certainly had heard rumours about him when i went to work some 4 years ago. i never believed in his existence.
until one day, when i MIA for a long long time. and he decided to look me up, at my home. He came and told me to go back to work in his company, believe that being in his company would be the best thing that could happen. i mean, he's so nice and kind. imagine if your dad did not turn up for work for say, a few years? and yet his boss still do not fire him. weird, right? but yeah, my boss was THAT weird. he even came to my house when he rules like, billions or even gazillions in his great big wonderful office. i felt so honoured that i just broke down and cry. perhaps the word is a little bit not modern, but still i must say that he was extremely merciful. anyway, i decided to go back to work. i as so touched that i just broke down at his feet and started crying. a little bit dramatic, but yes. i was extremely touched.
anyway, i went back to work. i was extremely hardworking for a while. you know, when he came down personally to my home to invite me back to work, i was so touched. i was so honoured. i was something in his eyes. some one in his eyes, i was worthy for this great man to not just look at me, but hear me explain why i failed to turn up for work. i was worthy to him that i deserve his forgiveness and and everything else that he was offering me.
but soon after that, i slacked. i no longer feel proud for who am i. i started to do all sorts of bad things to attract his attention and all. hoping that he'll come to visit my home again. but what i never knew then was that he was always always looking at what i was doing.
soon, when my efforts did not pay off, i decided that i'll just stop coming to work. since i'm no longer worthy in his eyes, i might as well just stop working for him.
what i never knew was, he never stopped looking out for me.
and He, is God. He, is Jesus.
i want to continue to work in His kingdom. i dont want to be someone who is always not turning up for work. I do not want to be a
part time worker. i want to work there full time.
oh God, bring me back. let me experience you again.
you know, he is so merciful that he WILL forgive you of all your impurities and unrighteousness if you confess your sins. he will overlook all your imperfections and love you as much as you
deserve the love that he pours out unto you.
He knocked on my door and i took ages to answer Him. don't let Him wait, he will always be knocking until you open your door and open your heart to Him and invite Him into you.
Labels: All of my Days, Church on Fire, For All You've Done, He's Real, Never Let Me Go, There is none like You, 我一生要讚美你, 我愛你，我主, 這一生最美的祝福
Monday, September 17, 2007
17 more days.
i suddenly want a zen stone very badly. that's greed.
i will study hard. today i did another essay and gave it to ms teo to mark. :/ freaky. i think i wrote out of point. but still. well. hayyys.
i found a pouch that i want....great man. $17. :( why are things so expensive?! rarh! so irritating!!! but on a happier note, i got a haircut today and also 2 new shirts.
:) i swear the shirts rock. haha. i saw a lot of shirts that i like but theres a word called 'budget' and i cannot possibly ask my mum to buy every shirt that i want. haha! i got 2 identical shirts. i wanted another one, but there wasnt my size. or rather there's my size but i will prefer a bigger one since i felt uncomfort wearing that. but it looked good. :)
today i walked to the market from the interchange. the whole trip was about 15min. not bad eyy. i used to take 20 min. :D
okays.
oh man cherie. you so need to catch up on your work. or you are so going to die and how on earth am i supposed to hand up worksheets 7.3 and 8.1's corrections when i didn't get them back in the first place?! rarh. :(
i shall sms tanny later.
"Between the Tides" is a good book. really. i stayed up till 3am today morning to write an essay on this book. i love books! i shall buy it when i have the mesos. :D
you'll know what mesos are if you play maple. i shall dedicate my time to more meaningful activities than play maplestory or...well. club penguin and neopets. *sheepish smile*
cherie! go study!
wait lah...finish listening to Church on Fire first.
see, i'm a pro procrastinater. nono. i shall be good for once. :) i'll log off.
BLAH! i just remembered there's geography remedial tomorrow. how nice. but it also means missing chinese remedial. :D
Jesus Reigns...and TOODS! haha! HOODS!
okay, never mind me. i'm mad.
i will study hard. today i did another essay and gave it to ms teo to mark. :/ freaky. i think i wrote out of point. but still. well. hayyys.
i found a pouch that i want....great man. $17. :( why are things so expensive?! rarh! so irritating!!! but on a happier note, i got a haircut today and also 2 new shirts.
:) i swear the shirts rock. haha. i saw a lot of shirts that i like but theres a word called 'budget' and i cannot possibly ask my mum to buy every shirt that i want. haha! i got 2 identical shirts. i wanted another one, but there wasnt my size. or rather there's my size but i will prefer a bigger one since i felt uncomfort wearing that. but it looked good. :)
today i walked to the market from the interchange. the whole trip was about 15min. not bad eyy. i used to take 20 min. :D
okays.
oh man cherie. you so need to catch up on your work. or you are so going to die and how on earth am i supposed to hand up worksheets 7.3 and 8.1's corrections when i didn't get them back in the first place?! rarh. :(
i shall sms tanny later.
"Between the Tides" is a good book. really. i stayed up till 3am today morning to write an essay on this book. i love books! i shall buy it when i have the mesos. :D
you'll know what mesos are if you play maple. i shall dedicate my time to more meaningful activities than play maplestory or...well. club penguin and neopets. *sheepish smile*
cherie! go study!
wait lah...finish listening to Church on Fire first.
see, i'm a pro procrastinater. nono. i shall be good for once. :) i'll log off.
BLAH! i just remembered there's geography remedial tomorrow. how nice. but it also means missing chinese remedial. :D
Jesus Reigns...and TOODS! haha! HOODS!
okay, never mind me. i'm mad.
Labels: Break Free, Call Your Name, Church on Fire
Friday, September 14, 2007
i realised that i have been blogging a lot. :/ but no worries. :) this is gonna be short!
i just went out to find a bag. yeah, sling bag. but i ended up getting a gym bag!!! the person sitting next to me on monday morning will be so irritated, i assure you. :D hahas. wy's bag big enough liao...hehe. now i compete with her. :D mine bigger!!! haha.
i wanted the other one lorh. :( sad luh. what old model this is the latest model. but so what. its so huge! its like 2 times the breadth of the larger crumpler? the person next to me is so going to hate me man. haha...
toods
i just went out to find a bag. yeah, sling bag. but i ended up getting a gym bag!!! the person sitting next to me on monday morning will be so irritated, i assure you. :D hahas. wy's bag big enough liao...hehe. now i compete with her. :D mine bigger!!! haha.
i wanted the other one lorh. :( sad luh. what old model this is the latest model. but so what. its so huge! its like 2 times the breadth of the larger crumpler? the person next to me is so going to hate me man. haha...
toods
Thursday, September 13, 2007
i spent 2 hours altogether, today and yesterday looking for a perfect multi-purpose pouch such that i won't be searching for my wallet and nametag and everything else every single morning. anyway, i found one, yesterday. but it was way too big and little bit weird to bring it to school, so i went hunting for another one. and i found it. Finally!
its $9 by the way, so i probably have to save up again. anyway, we're going to get our class-tee next week! :) haha! okay.
Show Your Support
Please show your support by clicking on the link above. :) click and you'll find out! :)
its $9 by the way, so i probably have to save up again. anyway, we're going to get our class-tee next week! :) haha! okay.
Show Your Support
Please show your support by clicking on the link above. :) click and you'll find out! :)
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
to cherie.
cherie. you MUST wake up from this idea.
cherie. you MUST work 10 times harder.
cherie. you MUST learn to be determined.
cherie. you MUST perservere.
cherie. you MUST be strong.
cherie. you MUST be tough.
cherie. you MUST be harsh on yourself.
cherie. you MUST stand on your own two feet.
cherie. you MUST learn to be able to take burdens.
cherie. you MUST learn not to succumb under pressure.
cherie. you MUST not say, 'i can't'.
cherie. you MUST persevere to the end.
because you have to.
they need you. and you can't give up like that. you must learn not to cry because you feel like you cant take it anymore. cherie. you are strong. you are that pillar. and a strong, good pillar never falls. you have to be that pillar because it is your job. when he is not here, it is your job. you cannot forsake them.
you cannot forsake them just to have your own pleasures. you must not forsake them because you are selfish. you must learn to share and not yield. you must learn to bear everything, bear with everything. because you are the only foundation this place has left. learn to stand on your two feet. learn to be independent. learn to lead. learn lift people up if you have to.
learn to prioritise. learn not to shout. learn not to lose your temper. learn to be able to take in everything. every insult that poured from her mouth.
learn learn learn. and God will help you. God will give you this wisdom.
you and you alone can do what he can and no other can. the others weak, you're strong.
stand up. and fight.
cherie. you MUST work 10 times harder.
cherie. you MUST learn to be determined.
cherie. you MUST perservere.
cherie. you MUST be strong.
cherie. you MUST be tough.
cherie. you MUST be harsh on yourself.
cherie. you MUST stand on your own two feet.
cherie. you MUST learn to be able to take burdens.
cherie. you MUST learn not to succumb under pressure.
cherie. you MUST not say, 'i can't'.
cherie. you MUST persevere to the end.
because you have to.
they need you. and you can't give up like that. you must learn not to cry because you feel like you cant take it anymore. cherie. you are strong. you are that pillar. and a strong, good pillar never falls. you have to be that pillar because it is your job. when he is not here, it is your job. you cannot forsake them.
you cannot forsake them just to have your own pleasures. you must not forsake them because you are selfish. you must learn to share and not yield. you must learn to bear everything, bear with everything. because you are the only foundation this place has left. learn to stand on your two feet. learn to be independent. learn to lead. learn lift people up if you have to.
learn to prioritise. learn not to shout. learn not to lose your temper. learn to be able to take in everything. every insult that poured from her mouth.
learn learn learn. and God will help you. God will give you this wisdom.
you and you alone can do what he can and no other can. the others weak, you're strong.
stand up. and fight.
Monday, September 10, 2007
spiritual dryness
I don't know how I changed from 'Isn't the world so perfect?' to now.
I don't know.
Suddenly felt sick of everything.
Sick of everybody's expectations.
Sick of trying so hard at everything but not succeeding in any.
Sick of slogging my guts out in the hope of achieving something only to fail and have people biting at me because I did.
Sick of having no-one recognise I'm slogging my guts out.
Sick of barely surviving to juggle everything.
Sick of everybody trying to compete.
Sick of everybody trying to care.
Sick of everybody thinking I'm a slacker, that I'm not doing my best.
I just can't.
Deal with it.
Sick because I can't.
Sick of doing things I don't wanna.
Can't get a single moment alone.
Sick of having people ask,"Slacking again ah?" when I finally wanted to try again.
And when I finally decide to slack, getting attacked by people's criticisms.
Sick of having lost my refuge.
And that's also my fault.
i was wondering if i should have quoted from her blog, but sometimes i can't help but feel the same. some things are
better left unsaid and i will leave them unsaid, at least not here anyway. it would do no good to anyone.
went to bed at 4 today morning, dont ask me what was i doing because i won't bother to reply. haha. i sent out prayer requests between 3-4am in the morning? haha! it's not the first time anyway. but i'm feeling extremely tired.
today whole day was extremely grilling. i was awake most of the time, well i was all the time. IT was slack, but making some personal webpages makes me feel satisfied. at least i spent that 1hr well. then it was math. okay lah. i handed up everything except for question 8. sheesh. haha. its done yes yes, but i havent wrote it out in proper yet. :( in draft i mean.
then science was a little bit crappy. msgoh came to teach us chem, but since most of us did not do the past year paper so it was practically pointless.
chinese was okay but i forgot to hand up my zuowen.
LA. mind boggling essay questions to practice.
and on top of all that, i still have tonnes that i promised myself i would do. how nice. i'm so going to be dead.
btw i think mrtan is running a fever. he was boiling when he touched me today.
//to Jesus
Sometimes i really feel as though i am carrying the world. yes, i know because of my results people tend to cast weird looks at me. and in church. sometimes its just so awkward when they refuse to understand that i really need help in my studies. and when they hear nanyang they just go wow. and even ames when i was working on it they say you're from math olympiad? it's stressful to live in this world when you feel like you're cheating on other people. when you're so rotten inside and people think that you're oh-so-wonderful because you bear the name of your school. its a weight. and at times, i really wondered why on earth did i even yearn to be in this top school. its not a nice feeling and when you're trying to push yourself to just simply meet the expectations the others have for you, you just find it all pointless. you find it meaningless. and you start questioning yourself, why am i getting good grades for? you turn to your parents for answer and they say so that you will have a bright future. what is the bright future for? so that you won't starve in future, you will have a good salary, nice car, nice condo. and then? they can no longer provide answers for you.
i've learnt to yearn for the end of times to come as soon as possible, because all i want to do is to live for Jesus. and when mschua said, if cherie really loves God, then she will do well in her studies. i was deeply hurt and confused. is life all about good grades? havent the bible taught us nothing?
James 4:4
You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
i'm deeply confused, by the world, and by the truth. i truly am confused and sometimes i really dont know who to look to and i think that is the cause of spiritual dryness.
i really really dont know how to go on. i told elysa about me facing certain difficulties in school and having this constant fear whenever it comes to math. all i felt is she listened as a youth leader, but not truly there to you know, facilitate.
sheryl feeling emotional and i seriously feel like its my responsibility to help her get back her living water.
when something goes wrong at home, i seriously felt like it's my fault and mine alone and i am standing in untter lonliness because i have to clean up the mess. sometimes i really feel like, crap.
i feel like a piece of paper struggling to stand up under the weight of a boulder.
weight of the world.
so what now?
i've tried to push all my sunday school schedules to the end of october. and i seriously can't take this kind of lifestyle anymore. i yearn for a change.
i'm baffled.
Sunday, September 09, 2007
tsktsk!
okay. no photos till end of years is over. because my computer takes eons of years to upload the pictures, so by the time the picutures are uploaded, i'll already be a fossil. anyways.
i will quarantine myself today. look at the amount of work undone.
no blog.
no msn.
no movies.
no tv.
no dan brown.
no george owell.
no music. :(
no prince of egypt.
no alexander.
no piano. D:
no miniclip :(
no club penguin :(
blah.
oh. and no computer. :/
byebye. see you tmr if i ever survive tmr D:
i will quarantine myself today. look at the amount of work undone.
no blog.
no msn.
no movies.
no tv.
no dan brown.
no george owell.
no music. :(
no prince of egypt.
no alexander.
no piano. D:
no miniclip :(
no club penguin :(
blah.
oh. and no computer. :/
byebye. see you tmr if i ever survive tmr D:
Friday, September 07, 2007
sometimes.
uneventful day. today is the second day that i've done nothing productive. first day was
wednesday, and today is the second day. well. :/
i feel. heh awful? physically and well, mentally too.
physically because i am sticky and sweaty all over, and yes...still too lazy to drag myself to the toilet to have a shower.
mentally because i haven't really done anything the whole day to help myself pull my grades up. the only productive thing i've done the whole day was to clean up my computer and free up 1GB of space by deleting useless files. its much neater now, my files and everything. :) i shall learn to save everything in the intended folders and not on the desktop and months later, endup deleting everything (important and non-important files alike). i really really need to learn to organise. anyways. i'm keeping a diary now! diary as in a book to record what to do everyday luh. its not exactly neat, but at least its useful and help me remember what i need to do althought i still tend to procrastinate. heh.
anyway. watched some television programmes. :) quite interesting. the tv was on from 6pm-8.30pm. not bad eyy. :) better than in the past, 5-7 hours straight in front of the tv. fridays and weekends only. :) i'm not that bad. and i've been missing a lot of cca practices so well. you can't expect how my exam pieces sound like. ah! how?
got to do work. really. must really force myself to sit down there and do everything. whether it kills me or not. well, i really dont have a choice now, don't i?
woke up today morning, wanting to lock myself in school the whole day, until 5pm - that's when the library closes, then i come home. just in time to catch an uncrowded bus home. but my hopes are dashed. i overslept. actually i woke up. but i fell asleep again. so...you can expect what next. nothing. so today i practically did nothing. so i shall do work later. i editted the class' script though. :)
i've got a lot of things to say about a lot of issues. but still. i shall decide where i shall pen my thoughts. :)
about this 'emo' thing going on. i think this term has been, largely abused. okay, even the word
has been abused. emo is the short form of emotional. and what's the definition of emotional?
1. pertaining to or involving emotion or the emotions.
2. subject to or easily affected by emotion: We are an emotional family, given to demonstrations of affection.
3. appealing to the emotions: an emotional request for contributions.
4. showing or revealing very strong emotions: an emotional scene in a play.
5. actuated, effected, or determined by emotion rather than reason: An emotional decision is
often a wrong decision.
6. governed by emotion: He is in a highly emotional state of mind.
okay then, what's the meaning of emotion.
1. an affective state of consciousness in which joy, sorrow, fear, hate, or the like, is experienced, as distinguished from cognitive and volitional states of consciousness.
2. any of the feelings of joy, sorrow, fear, hate, love, etc.
3. any strong agitation of the feelings actuated by experiencing love, hate, fear, etc., and usually accompanied by certain physiological changes, as increased heartbeat or respiration, and often overt manifestation, as crying or shaking.
4. an instance of this.
5. something that causes such a reaction: the powerful emotion of a great symphony.
joy, sorrow, fear or hate. i feel emo here, emo there. when people are pensieve, even like me, sometimes, people go, is that even cherie? pensieve. only penning down his or her thoughts,
deep in thoughts, trying to figure something out. trying to observe something. that's being emotional? joy. sorrow. fear and hate. it seems like now only the emotion sorrow is being considered as a emotional feeling. what about joy? in the past 2 years, i can swear that i haven't been seeing anyone describe someone who is happy as emotional. maybe not, maybe when the person's tears of joy comes flowing that we'd 'classify' him or her as being emotional.
when someone gets a little bit, teeny weeny down then we say, eh, dont emo leh. you emo i also emo. like what on earth?! i won't deny that sometimes even i use the term emo inappropriately. but still.
just yesterday i was just preparing a sunday school lesson about not being affected or influenced by the negatives, such that you stop praying and all because you get carried away by the material world and all.
and today i just felt like talking about this. i've a lot to say about a lot of things so they just keep coming for me to pen it down sometimes. i dont have a habit of writing my emotions down
because they will end upas gibberish that no one on earth can understand. so it'll be much better if everything was typed out.
i've been trying to refrain myself from going online too much. like 15min a day. online as in on
msn.
anyways, till then. and photos the next time i post. :)
wednesday, and today is the second day. well. :/
i feel. heh awful? physically and well, mentally too.
physically because i am sticky and sweaty all over, and yes...still too lazy to drag myself to the toilet to have a shower.
mentally because i haven't really done anything the whole day to help myself pull my grades up. the only productive thing i've done the whole day was to clean up my computer and free up 1GB of space by deleting useless files. its much neater now, my files and everything. :) i shall learn to save everything in the intended folders and not on the desktop and months later, endup deleting everything (important and non-important files alike). i really really need to learn to organise. anyways. i'm keeping a diary now! diary as in a book to record what to do everyday luh. its not exactly neat, but at least its useful and help me remember what i need to do althought i still tend to procrastinate. heh.
anyway. watched some television programmes. :) quite interesting. the tv was on from 6pm-8.30pm. not bad eyy. :) better than in the past, 5-7 hours straight in front of the tv. fridays and weekends only. :) i'm not that bad. and i've been missing a lot of cca practices so well. you can't expect how my exam pieces sound like. ah! how?
got to do work. really. must really force myself to sit down there and do everything. whether it kills me or not. well, i really dont have a choice now, don't i?
woke up today morning, wanting to lock myself in school the whole day, until 5pm - that's when the library closes, then i come home. just in time to catch an uncrowded bus home. but my hopes are dashed. i overslept. actually i woke up. but i fell asleep again. so...you can expect what next. nothing. so today i practically did nothing. so i shall do work later. i editted the class' script though. :)
i've got a lot of things to say about a lot of issues. but still. i shall decide where i shall pen my thoughts. :)
about this 'emo' thing going on. i think this term has been, largely abused. okay, even the word
has been abused. emo is the short form of emotional. and what's the definition of emotional?
1. pertaining to or involving emotion or the emotions.
2. subject to or easily affected by emotion: We are an emotional family, given to demonstrations of affection.
3. appealing to the emotions: an emotional request for contributions.
4. showing or revealing very strong emotions: an emotional scene in a play.
5. actuated, effected, or determined by emotion rather than reason: An emotional decision is
often a wrong decision.
6. governed by emotion: He is in a highly emotional state of mind.
okay then, what's the meaning of emotion.
1. an affective state of consciousness in which joy, sorrow, fear, hate, or the like, is experienced, as distinguished from cognitive and volitional states of consciousness.
2. any of the feelings of joy, sorrow, fear, hate, love, etc.
3. any strong agitation of the feelings actuated by experiencing love, hate, fear, etc., and usually accompanied by certain physiological changes, as increased heartbeat or respiration, and often overt manifestation, as crying or shaking.
4. an instance of this.
5. something that causes such a reaction: the powerful emotion of a great symphony.
joy, sorrow, fear or hate. i feel emo here, emo there. when people are pensieve, even like me, sometimes, people go, is that even cherie? pensieve. only penning down his or her thoughts,
deep in thoughts, trying to figure something out. trying to observe something. that's being emotional? joy. sorrow. fear and hate. it seems like now only the emotion sorrow is being considered as a emotional feeling. what about joy? in the past 2 years, i can swear that i haven't been seeing anyone describe someone who is happy as emotional. maybe not, maybe when the person's tears of joy comes flowing that we'd 'classify' him or her as being emotional.
when someone gets a little bit, teeny weeny down then we say, eh, dont emo leh. you emo i also emo. like what on earth?! i won't deny that sometimes even i use the term emo inappropriately. but still.
just yesterday i was just preparing a sunday school lesson about not being affected or influenced by the negatives, such that you stop praying and all because you get carried away by the material world and all.
and today i just felt like talking about this. i've a lot to say about a lot of things so they just keep coming for me to pen it down sometimes. i dont have a habit of writing my emotions down
because they will end upas gibberish that no one on earth can understand. so it'll be much better if everything was typed out.
i've been trying to refrain myself from going online too much. like 15min a day. online as in on
msn.
anyways, till then. and photos the next time i post. :)
Labels: 年歲的冠冕
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
i've thought about it. (:
i've thought of what i will talk about next week for cell, that is.
behold! :)
we still need a location though.
Deliver us is great in Hebrew, English, French, German, Czech, Spanish and Cantonese. oh man. ahhh. so beautifulllll
behold! :)
we still need a location though.
Deliver us is great in Hebrew, English, French, German, Czech, Spanish and Cantonese. oh man. ahhh. so beautifulllll
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
i'm going to work like i've never worked before.
Monday, September 03, 2007
sailing the high seas.
its going to be rough, i know.
its going to be tough, i know.
there'll be much more rough seas to sail. so much more tides to overcome, but i'll sail through it.
i'll sail through it if it's His will. and i believe it's His. :)
i just watched Prince of Egypt and yes, i'm truely touched. and i'm fueled for a tough night. :)
tomorrow there's cell and i'm going to study. well...study harder than before. hopefully the school's library is opened for me. :) and well. :)
i'm ready. :D
btw, Does God exists?
A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed.
As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation.
They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said:
'I don't believe that God exists.'
'Why do you say that?' asked the customer.
'Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist.
Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people?
Would there be abandoned children?
If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain.
I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things.'
The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument.
The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop.
Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and
an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkempt.
The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber:
'You know what? Barbers do not exist.'
'How can you say that?' asked the surprised barber.
'I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!'
'No!' the customer exclaimed. 'Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside.'
'Ah, but barbers DO exist! That's what happens when people do not come to me.'
'Exactly!' affirmed the customer. 'That's the point! God, too, DOES exist!
That's what happens when people do not go to Him and don't look to Him for help.
That's! Why there's so much pain and suffering in the world.'
well. if you need more answers, contact me. :) my email's there on your right. i may not be the best person, but i'm more than willing to provide the answers to your questions.
its going to be tough, i know.
there'll be much more rough seas to sail. so much more tides to overcome, but i'll sail through it.
i'll sail through it if it's His will. and i believe it's His. :)
i just watched Prince of Egypt and yes, i'm truely touched. and i'm fueled for a tough night. :)
tomorrow there's cell and i'm going to study. well...study harder than before. hopefully the school's library is opened for me. :) and well. :)
i'm ready. :D
btw, Does God exists?
A man went to a barbershop to have his hair cut and his beard trimmed.
As the barber began to work, they began to have a good conversation.
They talked about so many things and various subjects.
When they eventually touched on the subject of God, the barber said:
'I don't believe that God exists.'
'Why do you say that?' asked the customer.
'Well, you just have to go out in the street to realize that God doesn't exist.
Tell me, if God exists, would there be so many sick people?
Would there be abandoned children?
If God existed, there would be neither suffering nor pain.
I can't imagine a loving God who would allow all of these things.'
The customer thought for a moment, but didn't respond because he didn't want to start an argument.
The barber finished his job and the customer left the shop.
Just after he left the barbershop, he saw a man in the street with long, stringy, dirty hair and
an untrimmed beard. He looked dirty and unkempt.
The customer turned back and entered the barber shop again and he said to the barber:
'You know what? Barbers do not exist.'
'How can you say that?' asked the surprised barber.
'I am here, and I am a barber. And I just worked on you!'
'No!' the customer exclaimed. 'Barbers don't exist because if they did, there would be no people with dirty long hair and untrimmed beards, like that man outside.'
'Ah, but barbers DO exist! That's what happens when people do not come to me.'
'Exactly!' affirmed the customer. 'That's the point! God, too, DOES exist!
That's what happens when people do not go to Him and don't look to Him for help.
That's! Why there's so much pain and suffering in the world.'
well. if you need more answers, contact me. :) my email's there on your right. i may not be the best person, but i'm more than willing to provide the answers to your questions.
Sunday, September 02, 2007
time flies.
time flies when you're studying. like yesterday night. i was doing math. i started at 2am. and at 4am i finally finished 2 exercises of about 50 questions.
and i woke up at 11.30 :)
and oh. time flew yesterday.
and friday. hahas. nothing to say...just that now the house is really really quiet.
dad's in china.
sister's in china.
and millions of smses to reply. :/
homework!
and i woke up at 11.30 :)
and oh. time flew yesterday.
and friday. hahas. nothing to say...just that now the house is really really quiet.
dad's in china.
sister's in china.
and millions of smses to reply. :/
homework!
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