Tuesday, March 20, 2007
second day of term 2.
am really tired now. no heart to write much. anyway. yup. rehearsal went badly today. the next one's full dress already. what's with us?
honestly speaking, i don't have the drive to go on anymore.
sickly school work.
sickly performance.
bad attitude.
lousy.
why's everything so lousy? even the bus. yuck. hate it man. badbadbad.
on the other hand, mrs sandy tan rocks. hahas. that was really out of point. but still. school was ok. it was just the after school part. the rehearsal. totally depressing. sec1s, fellows. myself even. some sec3s also. even the sec4s. bad. as a junior, i don't have a strong stand to criticise. but when i see my seniors laugh and play as if there was nothing great happening, as if the rehearsal time was just play time. i feel depressed. and i don't see the source of motivation.
sec1s. fine. it's their first experience, we understand that. some people have never touched the instruments before. totally new to the instrument. and yet, they have to do so much work. i have nothing to say except put in more effort.
sec2s. even worse. we've been in the ensemble for a year now and still, we are not treating things seriously. concert is only 4 days away. an a an hour's time, it would be three. three days. how much more can we achieve if we continue to slack through these 3 days? 72 hours? what can we do?
we are left with less than 10 hours to polish up ourselves such that we'll shine on the 24th. i really have no faith now, that we'll do well.
it seems to me that all those spoken by yuhui, shuhui, lydia. all of them have fallen of deaf ears. they might as well not strain their throats to holler at us.
i feel sick of having to remind my peers or even sometimes, seniors to stop fooling around. no other motives except for making our concert a great one. i think after this concert, we won't have anymore faith to do something good.
first concert very good.
second concert good.
third concert. bad?
i don't even know if we can do a 60% for our concert. laoshi only expected us to get only a gold standard. i think the furthest we can go is a high bronze. depressing but true. because this is the ugly truth. we slacked too much. we left too many things last minute, thus losing our drive. losing our source of motivation.
drive, where have you gone.
honestly speaking, i don't have the drive to go on anymore.
sickly school work.
sickly performance.
bad attitude.
lousy.
why's everything so lousy? even the bus. yuck. hate it man. badbadbad.
on the other hand, mrs sandy tan rocks. hahas. that was really out of point. but still. school was ok. it was just the after school part. the rehearsal. totally depressing. sec1s, fellows. myself even. some sec3s also. even the sec4s. bad. as a junior, i don't have a strong stand to criticise. but when i see my seniors laugh and play as if there was nothing great happening, as if the rehearsal time was just play time. i feel depressed. and i don't see the source of motivation.
sec1s. fine. it's their first experience, we understand that. some people have never touched the instruments before. totally new to the instrument. and yet, they have to do so much work. i have nothing to say except put in more effort.
sec2s. even worse. we've been in the ensemble for a year now and still, we are not treating things seriously. concert is only 4 days away. an a an hour's time, it would be three. three days. how much more can we achieve if we continue to slack through these 3 days? 72 hours? what can we do?
we are left with less than 10 hours to polish up ourselves such that we'll shine on the 24th. i really have no faith now, that we'll do well.
it seems to me that all those spoken by yuhui, shuhui, lydia. all of them have fallen of deaf ears. they might as well not strain their throats to holler at us.
i feel sick of having to remind my peers or even sometimes, seniors to stop fooling around. no other motives except for making our concert a great one. i think after this concert, we won't have anymore faith to do something good.
first concert very good.
second concert good.
third concert. bad?
i don't even know if we can do a 60% for our concert. laoshi only expected us to get only a gold standard. i think the furthest we can go is a high bronze. depressing but true. because this is the ugly truth. we slacked too much. we left too many things last minute, thus losing our drive. losing our source of motivation.
drive, where have you gone.
// posted by My name is Oherie. @ 10:45 pm 
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